Saturday, November 22, 2008

My Personal Twilight Adventure

It isn't every day you're stuck in bumper to bumper traffic on a narrow, winding alley road -- inching along every five minutes -- when a pregnant woman comes running by, inches from swiping your car because there isn't a side walk. Dare I mention it's pitch black outside with only the street lamps and business signs to light the path?

Yes, you guessed it. It was I, 7 month pregnant red haired Twilight lover, heaving up the alley way in heeled boots wondering just how bad it would be if I happened to go into preterm labor and if this particular decision was worth it. You see, I left early to the movies (meeting some girlfriends at the theater for a much needed girls night out that I haven't escaped to in some time) to stop and snatch a soda. That's right, I cheat. I can't fathom paying $5 for a drink I don't get refills on, let alone the $10.50 price tag on the ticket. Plus, I was in dire need of some movie theater popcorn and I only had so much money to hash out. The popcorn was another $5.75 (and that's for a small I can never finish on my own).

But I didn't expect the worst. I wasn't aware of the horrible traffic conditions on the street leading to the alley way street (it really is like an alley way, they should honestly come up with a plan to build a real road). This theater is the only theater nestling the suburban sprawl of my city, yet lacks a real, honest-to-goodness road to get to it by. Seriously. I slow to a stop behind a line of cars at 6:45. The movie starts at 7:15. But all I have to do is turn into the alley way road, drive half a block to the next road, turn, and then viola, there's the theater parking lot.

7:00 arrives and I've only moved about 3 or 4 car lengths. What the hell? Now, I'm already known for my anger (usually at myself than anything else) and I'm fervently trying to control it, which is really hard to do when you already have hormones working against you. I want to smack my steering wheel, scream outloud at the absurdity of it all, roll down my window and yell at the two parked police cruisers they need to tell the city to do something about this . . . but I don't. I grip my steering wheel tight and grind my jaw, texting the friend that has my tickets I probably won't get there in time. Of all the nights, of all the MOVIES to be stuck in this fowl predicament.

And then I get an idea. Another girlfriend of mine was running late, but I had called and intercepting her traveling plans, telling her to take the back route (a winding road less populated yet farther out of the way to get to). I called her again and told her my plan. As soon as I turned into the alley way, I was going to park behind the convenient store and meet her a block away at the Chili's restaurant.

So it's 7:15, the movie has started, and I grab my purse stocked with soda and a laffy taffy, and some paper on top to disguise it since my zipper is broke, and I haul ass out my mini van and begin sprinting next to the line of cars waiting to get to the theater. And it was no secret of my condition, I was wearing a skin tight brown maternity shirt seemed at the sides for extra clarification: I'm pregnant!

By the time I made it to the parking lot of Chili's, my friend was waiting with wide eyes and opened mouth. After lecturing me about why I shouldn't run in my condition, I just shook my head while panting, barely getting out "Don't tell Chad!" (that would be my over protective safety freak husband, who would have thrown more of a fit about me parking in some ominous backlit parking lot and running by myself at night than running while I was pregnant.)

She drops me off at the front and goes to park. Suffice to say, it has a happy and a sad ending. We both make it into the theater in time to catch the last preview. I'm confident this would NOT have happened if I would have waited in that line and then searched for parking once I got to the theater.

The bad news? The movie sucked monkey butt. I mean, seriously. I want to love it. I needed to love it after what I put myself through to get there on time. But so many parts were, well, corny. And it just didn't capture the essence of Twilight, the true, gripping story that makes those who've read the books love it so much. Plus, there was so much they shifted around and changed. Now, I'm a movie goer and I'd like to say expert, and I understand the reasonings behind some things. For instance, adding in the snippets of James and his gang when of course you read none of this in the book because it's all written 1st POV.

But there were little things. The tire chains her dad put on her tires without telling her changed to newer tires and an explanation. Them eating out at the cafe, when it was in Bella's nature to cook dinner ever night. Jacob, in the end, talking to Bella at the prom instead of dancing and talking. I mean, little things, but still, you would think the creator's, directors, producers of this film wouldn't belittle us, the readers, into thinking we wouldn't notice.

And it almost felt like they were trying to hard to reign in the teenagers. It had a horrible teenagerish feel to it. Really. It had nothing on Harry Potter, it was bad. I'm so sad. Not because of running my ass off in 30 degree weather while pregnant only to get disappointed, but because I want them to have a chance at making the next film. And hopefully redeeming themselves in the process.

I've made this long enough as it is. I should stop my rambling now. If you've seen Twilight, what were your thoughts?

10 comments:

  1. yikes! so glad you're safe...and yes, twilight was heavy loaded cheese. it was entertaining tho?

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  2. It was entertaining yes, just horribly disappointing. Which I guess happens when you get yourself hyped up with high expectations. Still, it could've been SO much better. They just didn't do it any justice. And thanks, Cindy, I don't think I would've done anything totally stupid to jeopardize my safety lol. Hopefully, anyway ;)

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  3. This sounds like something I would do! I can't stand paying movie theater prices for drink and food. And your husband sounds like my husband. LOL.

    I was going to see Twilight today... Now I'm not sure.

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  4. Rose, it's still an ok movie, you just expect more I think if you're a big book fan. So it all depend son your expectations. And your willingness to shell out the cash for something you may not end up loving. Hope you win that contest, btw!

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  5. Sounds like in the long run you'll remember your adventure more than the movie

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  6. Hah, probably. But I'm also a sucker. I'll probably still go buy a copy when it comes out on DVD.

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  7. Didn't see it, but there sure is a lot of buzz about it.

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  8. I refuse to see Twilight on the grounds that I'm bitter that HP didn't come out this weekend. Twilight may or may not (more likely not) have anything to do with that, but still, I feel bitter towards it anyway, lol

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  9. I think I might go see Twilight on Thanksgiving, since it's a day to indulge in cheese and sugar loading...

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  10. Colby- You know, I wondered about that (HP and all). I'm upset it didn't release this year as planned either.

    Nancy- Hah! Thanks for the laugh on that one. I think we're going to go see Quantum Solace.

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